Milestones

I wish I had something interesting to share. But, the fact is, my life is very small right now. I live in the triangle between bed, couch and desktop computer. I have not seen the outdoors except through my filthy windows in 72 hours. I do have a small success to share, though. Warning:  for some of you, this may set off your TMI alarms. Today, for the first time in over 72 hours I:

1. Did not take Vicodin. Ibuprofen was enough today.
2. Showered. It felt so good to wash that encrusted blood out of my belly button!
3. With the help of a gallon and a half of juice, as many fresh fruits and vegetables as my palate could take, thirteen stool softeners and about half a pot of coffee, I pooped!! Oh, GOD, that was a relief!!!!!

Hopefully coming soon:

1. Going outside!
2. losing the nine, that is correct, NINE pounds I gained in one day after my surgery! What's up with that? is that from the IV fluid?!
3. Baby makin'! (How ironically cruel that I have had nothing but fertile eggwhite-like fluids oozing out of me for 72 hours and actually feel a little in the mood while my body is in such pain!)

Also, a totally unrelated thought I had while watching Saturday Night Live last night: Do you think this sudden popularity of Earl is going to make the big, bushy porn-star mustache come back into style? God forbid! I can just see it, all the youngsters will be sporting them, like the goatees of the 90's. It will be what finally separates me from the young and the hip and definitively stamps me with "old and out of date." Because, there is NO WAY I will ever find that attractive. Sorry.

Comments

[Victoria Winters]

I guess I need to google the surgery you had, because I have no idea what it is and why you'd have blood in your belly button. As for the huge Earl mustache - um, ew?
Get better and rest easy!

[Victoria Winters]

Oh. Heh, heh. I guess I just could have read your previous psot to figure it out. Duh.

[cat]

Diggin the new look.

Hurrah for the poo!

If those mustaches come back you know the trendy boys in nyc will be sporting them soon. They did it with the awful sideburn chops they will probably do this too. Icky.

[Lisa]

Moustaches give me the *shivers*

Hope things continue to get better for you.